Why are you geh?

I'm pretty sure Legolas does the sitting... I mean, if I had to guess just by looking at them as a couple

I’m guessing legolass takes it like a champ, a fan of rough pounding

If LOTR was filmed today, they‘d be totally gay. All of the 4 hobbits with their 4 villages or small cities would have a different ethnicity, just to make sure SJW wouldn’t be hurt. Arwen would join the fellowship, to make sure there is more women empowerment. Boromir would be left out or came to join them after Gandalf fell, just to betray Latino Frodo instantly. Eowyn would be a strong short haired lesbian. Faramir would be in disgrace to his father because he is gay, not because Denethor is a dickhead. Ents would be gender fluid. Orcs would be portrayed as white men, oppressing the people of the west. Am I missing something?