People call me Sam, short for Samsung

One of my parent's dogs is named Molly. I thought that was her full name. It turns out she's actually called Molecule, and Molly is her nickname. Not that surprising as she came from my grandfather, who names his dogs after the weirdest things. One of them is Alec, whose real name is electricity, and another dog's name is an entire phone number for the fire department.

hmmm.. Casserole Jones. Has a ring to it

I'm Cas and it's for Cassio

My name is Richard and people call me a dick. Wtf. Did I do something horrible to them? Is it my conduct?

Cas-trated

Or May, short for Mayonnaise

Haaaaaahaaaaaaaa!!!!! Awesome!

How about everyone calls you Lee and your real name is LEVIATHAN

Or Rick, short for "Never Gonna Give You Up"